I have to step forward, which has to be brand-new step. I think I understand this necessity.
And I know many of the Japanese people already start doing that.
Before the earthquake, I was thinking I have to return to work with fresh mind and new perspective instead of doing the same thing and the same approach, and I thought I could do that after one month dense vacation.
However after the earthquake, I don't think I can go back to the same place with a light mental "reset", but I have to consent to my heart fully, and it should not be a "return" but should be a "complete start". Although to do a light reset is still something for me, thus I've been postponing to face that topic until now.
I emailed several colleagues in US to catch up situations, and they provided me the latest updates on each projects and org changes which we were communicated before my leave. Those have been proceeded further but in the same sphere as before,,, I mean, their values and the approach looked the same as before.
I think I HAVE TO change myself and my values, but I have this fear that I may go back to the same world as before pretty easily.
Our recent life with Okada family at KAIYU is very heart warming. In here, every small things have people's face and kindness.
For instance, Hana grand ma always feels anxious about Sana, and treat her with deep affection. I myself love to talk the same things again and again with Hana grand ma, and yesterday she said to me "my room is messy but pls come by sometime."
Yes, there's such kind of life in this world. Thanks for Okada family.
In our daily life, we unconsciously do the routines. Athough it's unconsciously done, we actually select what we do by ourselves, and abandoned the other options which we are not selected. I didn't realize I've been abandon something, but I should consciously prepare myself that I select one by myself, and not select another one.